For the first time since I became a Catholic I am starting to really understand the concept of making yourself less dependent on things and on the daily routine being the way it usually is. The idea isn't just to make you miserable but to INCREASE your dependence on God and make you less dependant on the things of the world. I used to be dependant on a good Krispy Kreme in the morning before work. Not only was that making me gain weight, it was putting me in a bad mood later in the day. I removed it from the daily lineup and the weeks immediately following it were hard. Now it is a rare treat as opposed to an expectation of something I deserve. I have learned to be content without.

My way of fasting tended to focus on the misery rather on the contentment to be acquired by dependence on God. That misses the point. "Be joyful" Paul commands.



I think the idea that we deserve anything on a daily basis is a thought process that most of us have to get over. Sometimes I get frustrated when I don't get a "precious" few moments to blog in the late evening or morning. Usually the interference involves the needs of one of my family members. How selfish am I to get frustrated about something far less significant than the needs of my wife or kids?

In the next few weeks I plan to identify the things I am used to having on a daily basis; the things I think I CANNOT do without and I am going to better discipline myself in regards to them in order to learn contentment without them. I resolve to work harder to serve my family in joy, even when I am tired or at my wits end.

It has always been my experience that if I don't discipline myself, God always has a way of shifting life around to ensure that I am more dependant on Him. I am always thankful for the shakeup because it points out my clear weaknesses and need to turn YET AGAIN to Him. Hindsight of course always reveals that there was a much easier path if I had made the decision to seek Him a lot sooner.

I might as well make the connection to joy a lot easier by taking the steps myself rather than relying on Him to gently nudge me ... or even rudely thrust me ... into understanding.